An Update

I haven't posted here in a while, and I know that's not the most clever title I could have given this post. To be quite honest about it, I'm at a loss for a topic on this post. But, I'm going to plunge ahead and do some writing, just to see what shakes out.

The holidays treated us fairly well this past year. We didn't travel to see family during the holiday season, but we did meet friends for dinner and a movie on Christmas Eve. That was a lot of fun, and it's becoming a Christmas tradition.

Right after that, Jen caught the flu, which turned into bronchitis. So, our New Year's was quiet and spent at home while she followed the doctor's orders to rest and recuperate. Where the time between then and now went is completely beyond me.

Ten days ago, we lost our cat, Geoffrey. He was about 15 and had a lot of health problems that finally got the best of the veterinarians. We'd been treating his diabetes with insulin, but other conditions like pancreatitis and heart disease made controlling his insulin levels a challenge. It's been tough because our cats are the closest we'll get to having kids. We lost our younger cat in November 2011, and now we're cat-less for a while.

We've lived in our current apartment since moving to NYC, and our lease has a clause saying we can't get more cats if anything happens to the two we had. Once we've given ourselves time to mourn losing our boy, we'll talk with the landlord about changing that clause. If he doesn't agree, we'll need to start apartment hunting. I'm sure some people would think that's a crazy reason to move, but it makes perfect sense to us.

We're in a duplex and he lives downstairs, so he'd know if we got more cats. Plus, he's talking about retiring in a year, and he mentioned he might sell when he does. So, we might need a new place to live anyway, even if he does allow us to get more cats.

On a more pleasant note, our 20th anniversary is rapidly approaching. After the whopping big vet bill we just had, we're not sure what we'll do for our 20th. Whatever we choose, I know it will be a great day. Every day with Jen is a great one, no matter what else is happening.

I'm terrible at imagining the future and what it will bring, so I never do well with that quiz about "Where do you see yourself in five years?" I simply can't envision where I'll live or what I'll do for work five years from now. However, I do know that Jen and I will be together then. That's the one thing I'm certain of.

A Shift in Focus

Thus far, November has been an interesting month. I heaved a sigh of relief last week that the 2012 Presidential campaign finally came to an end, which also meant an end to the flood of campaign commercials. Living in New York City, the local networks play ads for New York candidates, New Jersey candidates, and Connecticut candidates. I’m so glad I won’t see those people’s names or faces for a little while. And, I’m certain I speak for a lot of political junkies when I say I’m quickly reaching the point where I hate all politicians and all political parties equally. The Citizens United decision was a fiasco, and it’s time for a Constitutional change that outlaws the SuperPACs and corporations buying elections.

But, I digress. Politics is absolutely the last thing I wish to discuss this week. Instead, I’m looking at a shift in focus as a writer in my creative work. This shift was prompted by my attempt to participate in NaNoWriMo again this year. I’ve tried this in the past, typically with dismal results. This year, sadly, was no different. I quickly found myself behind in the word count by the first weekend. A 2-day migraine this past week ensured that I won’t be catching up this month.

Between NaNoWriMo and a mystery writing class I took about a decade ago, I have a few different novels in various stages knocking around in a drawer. Slowly, the idea is dawning that writing a novel may not be the right move for me as a writer at this stage of my career. I recently saw a suggestion for poets to try writing a poem a day for a poetic version of NaNoWriMo, and somehow that project seems more attainable than cranking out 50,000 words in 30 days does. Therefore, I’m going to shift focus starting tomorrow morning and work on writing a poem a day until mid-December.

What challenges have you attempted recently? How did they turn out? If you weren’t successful, how can you reshape the challenge so that it’s more attainable?

Coming Storms (Both Literal and Figurative)

This autumn has turned out to be full of surprises. I mentioned in a post earlier this month that several people close to me were facing some challenges in personal and work relationships. This past week brought new updates on two of the three situations.

Our friends here in New York are coming ever closer to needing new employment, which could mean they need to leave the U.S. permanently. That really bothers me, since the couple has been in the U.S. for over a decade. They’re the kind of hard working, well-educated people we want to stay in this country. My friend is an accomplished scholar with a Ph.D. in English, and her husband is a gifted graphic designer, yet the expense of sponsoring someone for a green card means neither can find an employer willing to support their efforts to stay in the U.S. permanently.

A relative who is facing some relationship challenges has let me know that some additional factors are involved in that situation. Some of the things I’ve learned about that situation don’t surprise me, although it makes me wish I were in a position to travel and visit that relative right now. I think being there could help, but it’s just not an option. In that earlier post, I mentioned how frustrated I feel when I can’t fix things, and this is definitely a situation where life is telling me to “sit and stay!” I just don’t happen to appreciate the message.

As if those personal storms weren’t enough, the weather forecast for the next few days suggests that the Northeast may be hit with an actual storm, in the form of Hurricane Sandy. Current predictions (as of Friday a.m.) suggest the storm could hit New York City early Tuesday morning. The forecast suggests the winds and rain from that storm will collide with a winter storm from the west and cold air from Canada, which could lead to heavier rains and/or snowfall. Plus, Monday will be a full moon, meaning higher tides and increased likelihood of flooding. Oh, and all of this could occur right after Jen’s birthday, which is Sunday.

With luck, none of those things will happen, but Jen and I are stocking up on supplies just in case. It’s a bit ironic. We left Arizona (where the worst weather-related issues were heat stroke, lightning-sparked wildfires, and flooding from monsoon rains) to move to Seattle, with its earthquakes, snow-capped volcanoes, and occasional winter snow or ice storms. Then, we moved from Seattle to Brooklyn.

In our six years in Brooklyn, we’ve had an earthquake, a tropical storm/hurricane, blizzards, flooding, tornadoes, and heat waves. For people who like to plan ahead and have control over situations, we sure picked an odd place to live. There’s not much we can do about the weather, other than prepare and hope for the best. Come to think of it, that’s all we can do about any of these situations. And, letting things take their course isn't really our strong suit.

A Week of Lessons

This past week has been full of learning opportunities, and I’m not sure I appreciate the lessons I’m learning.

My Facebook experiment has been a challenge. I find myself mindlessly navigating to the Facebook home page a few times a day or checking the Facebook app on my smartphone, which underscores that deactivating my account was a good idea. I hadn’t realized how often I would take “just a quick peek” at it, which usually turned into several minutes of reading posts and commenting. I haven’t seen indications that my productivity has increased yet, but I hope I will soon.

This week has also reminded me of some less-than-desirable personality traits. I’m the kind of person that likes to be in control of a situation, and I also usually plan for contingencies. The events of this past week have reminded me that I can’t always fix everything and my attempts at planning don’t always work.

One example of this affects one of my relatives. Last week, I learned that this person is going through a tough time with a personal relationship. As much as I want to swoop in and fix the situation, this week has reminded me that I simply can’t do that. The feeling of powerlessness that accompanied that realization really bothered me, because it reminds me that I need to stop trying to control everything.

In case I hadn’t learned my lesson the first time, I also learned that a close friend is struggling with a relationship issue too. Again, I can’t really do anything to help the situation, other than give these people my love and support. That’s not easy to do since we live in different states. But even if I were nearer to them, I couldn’t fix either situation. And, it’s not my place to try. But, my impulse to take charge and fix the issues keeps nudging me toward intervening.

And, in case I hadn’t gotten the message the first two times, I received a reinforced version of that message again yesterday. Another close friend, who is in the U.S. on a work visa, works for a company that is going through a restructuring. Several people have been laid off, and this friend is worried because losing the job would mean leaving the U.S. after over a decade of being here and attempting to get green card status. If that happens, my friend has only ten days to leave the country. Again, there’s nothing I can do, but I sure want to try.

The autumn change usually prompts me to some introspection, and I certainly have a lot to think about.