Old Before My Time But Refusing to Grow Up

Winston Churchill famously said, “Russia is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma.” While Churchill was discussing Soviet policy and Russian nationalism, his sentiment has been applied to a broad array of topics, often with “conundrum” replacing “puzzle” in the phrase. And, I think I can safely join the ranks of people and events that are triply perplexing.

This morning serves as an example. I’m reading Twitter posts while listening to a Pandora radio station, built around Harry Connick Jr. Many songs on the station are by Perry Como, Frank Sinatra, Bobby Darin, Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong. I’m also getting a few songs by Harry Connick, Diana Krall, John Pizzarelli (a personal favorite) and Michael Buble. (Truthfully, I could do with less Buble and more Dean Martin but whatever.) I’m bopping along to artists who were in their prime long before I was born and loving every minute of it.

At first glance, this is “old people’s music”. Some might argue that a person like me, in my late 30s, shouldn’t prefer this genre of music. But, the older I get, the more I love listening to jazz and classical. I’m still a fan of rock and pop but I rarely listen to country anymore, which was the mainstay of my adolescent years. Back in high school, listening to country was a great way to be deliberately weird. I’ve always liked doing things that made others shake their heads and say, “That’s just Ruth being Ruth.” I’m sure most of my family already knew it but I deliberately cultivate the loner-oddball persona. There, I admitted it. Ha!

Of course, I also still have my childlike traits too (some might say I’m childish, but I digress). I happily pour over the ThinkGeek website and I covet the working lightsabers they sell. I can’t justify spending over $100 for a lightsaber. But man, I’d love to have one! I can just picture having a lightsaber duel with Jen some evening during the summer. We’d have such fun! And, it would terrify the cats, which is an added bonus.

I guess in some ways I’m fortunate. I think I’d have been a grumpy old woman long before my time but Jen keeps me from taking myself too seriously. We’re still able to laugh and goof around, which keeps us young, I think. I just hope we can sustain that into our gray years.

Post-Grammy Thoughts

This post is a day overdue but I thought writing about the Grammys could be fun. Here are a few thoughts that are still with me, the morning after the 53rd Annual Grammy Awards:

1. I am THRILLED that Justin Bieber didn’t win last night. Since I was accused of being a closet Bieber fan, I want to state clearly here: I DO NOT like him or his music. Frankly, I have cats that could write better song lyrics. To finally put that nasty rumor to rest, my most recent “guilty pleasure” artist is Lady GaGa.

2. Speaking of Lady GaGa, I was underwhelmed by her Grammy performance. Perhaps it’s a case of setting the bar too high but I really expected a more flamboyant show from her. The egg was an interesting idea but I expected it to build from there.

3. By the way, what was wrong with the crowd at the Grammys? Why the lackluster response to The Mick? When Mick Jagger asks if you’re having a good time, you scream until the roof collapses. I don’t care HOW big a star you are! (And, I love that Cyndi Lauper and LL Cool J were both in the front row and rockin’ out while Mick strutted. That’s the way to do it!)

4. I’m still mulling over the supergroup Letterman proposed in his top ten list, which was “Lady Antebellum + Lady GaGa = Lady Antegagem”. What would we call that genre of music? Country Glam? Glamtry? Would it finally break “the lavender ceiling” at the Grand Ol’ Opry? And, can someone send me a mashup of “I Need You Now” and “Telephone”? Pretty please?

5. And, speaking of glam, I’m still not sure what to think about Cee Lo Green’s performance with Gwyneth Paltrow. I kind of liked it because it reminded me of Elton John’s appearance on The Muppet Show, back when he was still flamboyant (before he started writing Broadway and film scores and was knighted). But, I’m not a “Glee” fan so I don’t know if Paltrow’s inclusion was really necessary. I do know the performance made me think I’d accidentally taken drugs, which frightened me.

6. Speaking of drugs, I must give a huge shout-out to Rob Thomas. He was tweeting as he watched the Grammys last night, even though he usually doesn’t watch awards shows. Talk about some interesting insights and some outright hilarious quips. His comments on Marc Anthony were priceless. Following his feed is an excellent reason to have a Twitter account.

Guilty Pleasures

I’ve been thinking a lot about guilty pleasures the last few days. No, not the really deep, dark “secret pleasures” of the x-rated variety. Frankly, that’s a topic that I’d rather not consider, let alone discuss, on my blog. What people do in the privacy of their own homes isn’t of interest to me. I don’t want to hear about anyone’s secret fantasies or favorite bedroom activities. Oddly, though, people are always confiding things like that to me and I have no idea why. But, I digress.

Instead, I’m talking about those, “Gee, I’d be so embarrassed if anyone knew I listened to this musician or watched that TV show”-type of guilty pleasures. My ruminations were prompted by some new songs Jen and I bought and downloaded the other evening. Several of the songs were ones I selected by an artist I swore I would never own (and who shall remain unnamed). Glancing through our music collection, Jen started teasing me about the playlist I could create with the title “Guilty Pleasures.” Somehow, I’ve collected a fairly decent list of songs and musicians that I’d be embarrassed for my friends to know I liked.

Some of the songs that fit within that category are songs like, “Guitarzan” by Ray Stevens. It’s a silly song I remember fondly from my childhood. But, it’s not a song I want coming on while I’m driving with the windows down or when a friend rings the doorbell. Knowing my luck, I’d be belting that song at the top of my lungs, glance over and see my boss’s boss sitting in the car next to me, watching me. And, that’s when I want to crawl under the seat and hide.

Other songs that would fit into my “guilty pleasures” playlist are songs and musicians I’m too old to like but, somehow, have acquired. This category includes that unnamed artist and a whole host of others, including artists like The Backstreet Boys. Yes, I confess it. I liked some of their songs. I still do, in fact, and think they’d make a dandy addition to a “guilty pleasures” playlist. However, I certainly don’t want my friends or family dropping by while I have their music cranked and am singing and dancing around the living room.

Perhaps the bigger question is, why am I afraid to own my “guilty pleasures”? That is, why does the thought of someone teasing me about them bother me? Would my family and friends really tease me if they knew I liked those musicians and TV shows? And, why do I care if people do mock or tease me?

After all, I’ve been teased and mocked most of my life. In fact, I often think I deliberately invite that sort of good-natured ribbing. I’ve always considered myself to be an iconoclast, a bit of a lone wolf, someone who has always bucked the trends and marched to a different drummer. I’ve embraced and even cultivated that image, hoping to make it reality. So, if I am proud of my individuality (and I am), then why would I worry if someone thought my musical choices or TV programs were silly? I like them and I don’t really care if others don’t. So, why be shy about sharing my interests?

I don’t really have any answers to those questions. But, I plan to consider them at greater length. I think finding answers to those questions may help me in my larger goal for 2011 and my 39th year on the planet. That goal is to gain a better understanding of myself in order to live more authentically, with greater insights into what will make me happy, what I want to do with my talents and how I can use them to help others.

To close this post, I’ll ask my readers: What are you guilty pleasures? Which TV shows or musicians do you like but never want to admit? And, more importantly, why do you like them? What do they give you that other shows or musicians don’t?